UNCONTROLLABLE ANGUISH

I'd kill to be the one living without worry, unnecessary stress, or fear-shit I fear it all having all the dam phobias and schizophrenia is near...heights, fire, wild animals, bugs, closed spaces, and blood-anxiety order to the max wanting it to all go away and avoid that flood...that flood of concern and giving a fuck, I want to not care at all but I feel as though I'm stuck...stuck in a rut filled with bad dreams, those dam nightmares don't stop-why do I remember every stupid dream and what does it mean, I'm dying to die I'll never be on top...I'm not in control, hallucinations are real without illegal drugs-those thoughts of being attacked, bitten, or severely crippled I wish come with plugs...too many stairs my knees are getting weak don't look out the window, the elevator is worse you're standing too close, stop staring I got to go...this shower too hot, GOD bless our burned victims for I couldn't imagine what you're going through-all these what ifs and uncertainties are making me blue...You fuckin' raccoons what is your purpose??? I mean, why do you have hands? unrealistic animal with your glowing eyes blocking the dumpster taking a stance...spiders and bats, I mean really what for, hated you now, then, and forever more...I fear knives or any sharp object struggling to cut my veggies to cook, scared to get cut, pouring blood got me shook...Avoid this, prevent that, hate this, don't want that- ugh free me from this unwanted trouble, release me from drowning in this lonely ass bubble...